Sunday, August 14, 2005

I am Crucified with Christ (part 2)

"For I am crucified with Christ and yet I live
Not I but Christ that lives within me
His Cross will never ask for more than I can give
For its not my strength but His
There's no greater sacrifice
For I am crucified with Christ and yet I live"


There's no doubt about it. I am indeed crucified with Christ and yet I live.

Why?

Not I but Christ that Lives within me



Sigh, for the past few weeks I was feeling very uneasy..

uneasy in the mind
uneasy in the heart
uneasy everywhere...

I just can't figure out...

I haven't been the person God want's me to be...
I haven't been the person that Christ hopes me to be...

The decision maybe easy- choosing between impressing your peers and carrying up the Cross.

But, to actually TAKE up the Cross, it ain't easy for me..

I gotta set things straight with the Lord again!

I want to live in the mansion that Christ had promise us...
I want to walk on the streets that is made of gold...
I want to experience the immense joy which is beyond description
I want to see the Father's face
I want to touch the Father's hands
I want to change..

I can't do it alone....



It's been years since I actually did my devotions. The last time I done my devotions was with my mom.. like when I was a primary student??? that's like ages ago man!

I really want to get things straight with Christ..

No more lying to myself
No more pleasing friends
No more pride
No more anger
No more...
No more...

I'm hungry!!
I'm spiritually hungry!!
I need food
I need God's food!!!
I need HIS WORD!!!

I can't take the pain no more
I can't take the burden no more
I can't bear the load no more

I don't want to run away anymore...
I don't want to hide anymore...
I don't want to disobey Him anymore...


Dearest Jesus,

My heart is in pain, my soul is thirsty. Father, I'm tired of everything. I can't go on living without you. Jesus, I want to be loved, I want to see You face to face. I want to hold you so tight. I want to experience that Joy which everyone else is enjoying with You. I want to be who you want me to be. Heavenly Father, I want to change but I can't change alone. I need You to change me, I am sorry for what I've done in the past, I'm sorry for disobeying You numerous times. I'm sorry for doing things that not only made You unhappy, but also angry. I'm sorry for defiling the Holiest temple, which is my body in which You live in. I'm grateful for what You've done on the Cross. I thank You for the mercy and grace You've given me.
I am lifting my burdens to You Lord Jesus. Please take control of everything that I have.
Please help me put You first. Please rid me of my addictions of whatsoever I'm in bondage with.
Please BREAK the chains which has held me captive for so long. Please Father, reignite the flame that has been constantly failing me. I thank You for loving me, I thank You for being patient with me. I thank You for building the bridge so that I can cross over to Your side.
I thank You for caring for me. I thank You for standing next to me.
I love You Jesus and I will always love You.

I pray and ask all these things in the name of my MOST beloved, MOST wonderful, MOST powerful Jesus Christ,
Amen.

"Give me Jesus, Give me Jesus
You can have all this world
But give me Jesus.."



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